Street Market

So we decided to head to a local Street Market to look for some bargains. I had no actual ‘list’ of requirements but my plan was to browse and see if anything appealed. Mother was busy trying to find bows to put in her hair, and believe me, even in the height of the scorching sun (we got up late due to bad nights sleep – re UK news) she was on a mission, stopping at what it seemed every stall (just in case). After the first 50 ish stalls I had taken into slowly wandering down the middle as she popped from side to side. Suddenly I heard a heavily Dutch accented woman voice say ‘Hey, I have something just for you’ (I kept slowing strolling) she shouted ‘Hey! Hey’. I turned to see what the commotion was about. She was looking directly at me and again said ‘I have something just for you’ and beckoned with her hand. Now when I had idled past I hadn’t taken any notice what was on this stall, and as I approached I still didn’t pay much attention. I briefly looked round to look for Mother. She was stood stooped over a stall laden with trinkets (probably bows). The Dutch voice boomed out again ‘Come! Come’! (Yes alright on my way). As I got nearer my heart sank, laid out on her stall was some form of gadget, (it looked like a potato peeler) and she had one in her hand (bugger that’s the last thing I need on holiday). Oh well I was too close to back out now, I would just have to listen to the demo talk. She started ‘You are needing this, this will be good for you’ (how can a peeler ever be good for you?). She started moving it in a up and down motion in the air and then said ‘It will get rid of all of your facial hair it is ze best on ze market’ (gadget not a peeler but a facial hair remover). I could feel my face becoming more flushed and it was probably turning bright red and the best retort I could come up with was ‘Sod off’. I turned round (oh shit shit) where the hell was Mother……

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