The last seven weeks has flown by and I suddenly realised I hadn’t written an update. Sorry about that but it’s been quite busy here in the campo.

As you know I started this journey with my partner Mark, who had been my rock. However whilst here there has been a change, I am now living happily with Paco!

Paco has proved extremely useful and attends to the pool, walks the hounds and squeezes the oranges.

Gone are the days when we were alarmed when the water went off, or the water went a light shade of brown or the toilet didn’t flush, for us it is ‘Normal’. Our days revolve around the sun, we get up at sun rise and go to bed at sunset, we get our jobs done early in the morning to avoid the heat of the sun and relax in the afternoon, often observing siesta. The land is vast and the earth is parched so everything gets dusty within the day, including the dogs and us.

Trips to second hand shops and car boot sales have allowed us to make the house our home, new memories in a new place, time here has been priceless. Living amongst the mountains in this beautiful country has given me strength and made me appreciate the gift of life.

The loss of my son has had a truly profound effect on me that will be never ending and 15 months on cuts me to the core, but I no longer wish to join him, I have not given up, I am not throwing the towel in. I will live the rest of my life in the best way I can. I came to Spain looking for answers, why had this happened, what should I do, what did I do wrong? I didn’t find the answers but what I found was time to reflect, time to think and time for me. Because of that time I am able to be thankful for what I do have, I am appreciative and I am blessed.

This is the hardest journey for a parent but it is one I will survive, it’s a journey where I will make new memories, a journey where some family and friends will walk away, it is a journey travelled by many parents before me and many after me, but this is my journey and I am going to make it the best journey I can, I will fill it with memories, laughter and fun. And when I go on my final journey it will be to meet my son and I can say to him ‘My journey has ended I’m home’.

Note: For clarification purposes…..After spending numerous hours cleaning the pool, walking the land, picking and collecting the fruit Mark developed a deep sun tan, took to wearing a straw hat and beaded wrist bands, he morphed into Paco!