Up at 4am, very pleasant journey to the airport in the Audi A5, thanks Mark. Extremely large queues at budget airlines, walked past with nose in the air, and headed to Worldwide International Zirconia Zoom Airways. (Bugger can’t find them, found information desk, we have been transferred onto Thomson Airways, oh ok that sounds great, aren’t they like British Airways?). Will probably get free in flight meal and drinks…. Head to check in, small queue and ushered to a newly opened desk. Everything checked in no problems (bags within weight restrictions – great that means I can buy stuff on hols) heading to departure lounge.(Oh this is going very well, very well indeed). Approach HM customs, mother gets through and I get called over to be searched (this often happens so I wasn’t unduly worried – usually due to belly piercing). Nice lady frisked me and guess what……All clear…….Duty free here I come! Coffee in the departure lounge, quick trip round the shops, gate called and off we went to board the plane…….and that’s when all it turned to rat shit!……..to be continued!